It’s week 27 of the pregnancy and minds are beginning to wander – for the both of us.
The phone call last night at 7 pm was unexpected. I’d known she was working late in the office trying to get something done, and had the usual text to say she was leaving (about 15 minutes earlier). However, phone calls on the way home aren’t regular and usually means there’s an expected shortage of food and she’s covering her bases.
Tonight’s phone call was different. I could instantly identify the stress in her voice. “Hi honey, it’s been a bad day,” were the words I heard. The quivering voice told me it really was a bad day and it wasn’t just because of normal work stress. “I just put a half tank of petrol (gas) in the car.” Now this would normally not be a bad thing, except for the fact that said car is a diesel. OUCH! Today really is a bad day for poor preggers.
The mind has started to wander lately for my beautiful, mother-to-be. I noticed little things at first. Lunches left in the fridge, gravy seconds away from being poured on an iPad rather than her roast dinner, and the work pass hanging at its overnight resting place (to be fair that one happened before, just now with a bit more frequency). It’s a funny thing how the baby brain works, or rather more accurately, fails to work. It’s stranger still for me, as this lady is the most ace planner/organiser/project manager that I’ve ever met. How can a baby cause so much havoc?
Well, to be fair, my mind wanders too. Yes, I don’t think that dads-to-be are immune to the baby brain either. It’s not that I continually forget to do simple tasks that I’d normally be right on top of. That isn’t the problem. The problem with this man’s wandering mind is that I’m slowly starting to imagine a life with baby. Week 27 has brought on the realisation that things are going to change massively in the next three months.
Now, I’m not sure if all men go through this stage. I’m sure to some extent that every dad realises that their life is about to be flip turned upside down. My realisation is stronger, I’d suggest, for the reason that I’ve been here all before (albeit 8 years ago now) and I fully understand exactly how vast the change is going to be.
So my mind has been wandering through the first few months of restless nights, diaper changes, sick on the clothes, and all around baby-being-dependent-on-our-every-moves that’s coming our way. At times it’s a pleasant meander through all the expected joys. At other times, it feels like a treacherous trek through the valley of the shadow of death! OK, not that bad, but a bit daunting none the less.
If you see me walking down the street and I don’t say hello it’s because my mind is elsewhere. It’s somewhere between my current life and the madness that is the first year of child rearing. The joys of parenthood – we do it to ourselves!